Submitted by gfinacoma. Thank you!
Future Ted: I started things off with something cute and charming: “I was thinking about you, so I thought I’d send you a little texty text”. And the moment I hit ‘send’, I realised… It wasn’t cute at all. It was the lamest thing anyone has ever sent to anyone. And the worst thing about texting is that once you send it, you can never get it back.
How I Met Your Mother 4.21 - “The Three Days Rule”
Ted: Hey! I got a new rule. It’s kinda crazy, but I call it “You like her, you call her”.
Barney: I’m sorry, can you repeat that? I don’t speak “I never get laid”.
How I Met Your Mother 4.21 - “The Three Days Rule”
Future Ted: I still hadn’t decided what kind of professor I wanted to be. Authoritative, or cool guy. I thought I would decide in a moment. And I did. About 20 times.
Ted: Good morning. Sup dudes. SILENCE!
How I Met Your Mother 5.01 - “Definitions”
Ted: I don’t think the talk is necessary.
Marshall: WHAAAT?!
Barney: Thank you, Ted.
Ted: Because Robin is already his girlfriend.
Barney: WHAAAT?!
How I Met Your Mother 5.01 - “Definitions”
Marshall: Will you just have the talk? Okay, it’s a 5-minute conversation and then you get to have sex afterwards. It’s great. Back me up, Ted.
Ted: I don’t think the talk is necessary.
Marshall: WHAAAT?!
How I Met Your Mother 5.01 - “Definitions”
How I Met Your Mother 1.10 - The Pineapple Incident
Ted: Dude dude dude, don’t look! Blonde girl heading over to Robin right now. We are go.
Marshall: I don’t know what to do with my hands. What do I normally do with my hands?
How I Met Your Mother 3.14 - “The Bracket”
