From How I Met Your Mother Season 6 promo.
From How I Met Your Mother Season 6 promo.

For kathrynkinney.
Barney: Okay! Okay! You’re pissed! You deserve to be. Fine. You know what? One free shot. On me. Anywhere but the face.
Ted: [punches Barney in the groin]
Barney: AH! Who punches someone in the groin?!
How I Met Your Mother 3.17 - “The Goat”

From How I Met Your Mother Season 6 promo.

From How I Met Your Mother Season 3 bloopers.
For kellylisamurray.

Barney: So you’re not mad?
Ted: No! I’m not mad. Robin and I broke up a year ago. We’ve both dated lots of people since then. I’m with Stella now. Seriously, I’m fine with this.
Barney: I’m so relieved to hear you say that.
Ted: Yeah! Yeah… Oh hey, I just remembered. My mum is coming into town next month. Maybe you’d like to nail her too!
How I Met Your Mother 3.17 - “The Goat”

Submitted by gfinacoma. Thank you!